Jimmy Cracks Corn... and apparantly a whole LOT of people care. Sept 20, 07

So today the day was not a thrill fest to report I am sorry to say... and it's just TOO much PRESSURE to come up with something fun!I might just crack under the pressure. Well - Basically it was a 'computer' day for both of us. Rich continued his web design and Columbia stuff - occassionally poking his head out of his subterranean concrete office like Puxontony Phil. I spent the entire day writing correspondence in reference to my wilingness to shake my money-maker... ok - i'm actually not sure where my 'money maker' technically is. But I wrote letters to the big recording studio/production houses in Fort Wayne about my v.o. stuff; About a dozen letters to agents that handle v.o people in Indiana; and (sigh) about five letters to the local universities. There are like ten universities in the area - but eighty percent of them include questions in their teaching applications like this: "b) The mission of the college reflects an Anabaptist understanding of Christian faith. Give a brief statement of your personal faith development, including what it means to be a follower of Jesus Christ, and describe your current membership and involvement in a local church." I mean - it's their school - they can require what they want. But I just wish there were a couple places around here where people just wanted to get an good-ol education. The best bet I have is a branch of Purdue in Fort Wayne. They actually have a sizeable theatre department - and there were about fifteen classes I could teach on their syllabus, and about ten more that I could fudge my way through with Cliff Notes and a prayer (sure, you bet, I remember all my 18th Century theatre history). Anyway - they are in mid semester so they aren't going to need anyone now - but hopefully once they have my stuff - they'll call me if something comes up. And at least I spent like six hours sorting through their labyrinthian websites looking at their theatre (or more frequently 'communications') departments trying to find as much as I could. So I've tried... and these will go out in the morning:

THE ENVELOPE PLEEAAASSSSE. envelopes.JPG

Yes... basically i included that picture simply to prove that I did something with my day. Sue me. I did figure out that 'Communications' is the way a University that wants to try and bump up enrollment camouflages an Acting Degree. They have these really hysterical breakdowns of what you can do with a Communications degree (often involving cartoon characters.... no kidding) explaining that you can be.... "a lawyer!" "a politician" or "a tv star!". Also on the list was 'health care' which confused me slightly... "Dr, can you show me my appendix". "No...but would like you like to hear my up-tempo sixteen bars?".

So... on the subject of my "current involvement with a local church"... A small congregation has approached us about renting the facility for a few hours twice a week. I get ookey at organized religion in general...so Rich had to inject with a few tranquilizers and then we talked about it. The reality is that the money would be fantastic... it would enable us to worry a lot less about things... and keep moving ahead. They never want it for a long chunk in the day... and on Wednesday's it's early in the morning - before we get much done anyway. When we are mid auditorium construction and it isn't safe, we can move them into the foyer when neccessary. It could be ok. Rich agrees with me that they shouldn't have any exterior signage... and there are a few other little things we would ask them to agree to. We are going to go to one of their services and make sure they aren't doing anything with reptiles or burning large Wicker Men. And we'll see. We told them that the theatre is a disaster - and they don't seem to care - they are a small congregation and like the atmosphere of the building. And, frankly, if we tried to disagree with them on that subject too much... we wouldn't have bought the freakin place. But it wil definitely be in mid-rubble state most of the time... so if that's what they want... then maybe it's a dumb to look a gift horse in the mouth. What does that EVEN MEAN???

"AH, MAX, I FEEL A PSALM COMING ON." gloria.jpg

(some of you might wanna know.... that's Gloria Swanson standing in the rubble of the Roxy theatre.)

We are on the eve of the big Huntington event of the year... Yes, even bigger than a praying mantis on our building. The PIE-OEER FESTIVAL.

OK - wait - we interrupt this regularly scheduled blog for an explanation - SOMETIMES my spelling is bad. Ok - most of the time my spelling is bad... but SOMETIMES, just so you know, it's on purpose. See - Google has search engines. And for instance, if I type something that is a common phrase in the area...and I am writing something whimsical about it... then it might come up when that phrase is searched. And we - and by we, I mean pack-leader who protects us from angry villagers with torches - don't want that. So - sometimes I will spell Pioneer next to the word Phestival (see how I did that) on purpose. I prefer Pie-oneer Phestival...because I think there should be pie. There should always be pie.

I am very excited because at the Pie-Oneer Phestival they have fun-filled activities all weekend. That seem to repeat every hour. I think the theory is that people only go for like an hour...so why should the entertainment committee have to find two days worth of nifty county-type activity. So - it goes like this: Sheep Shearing Melodrama Cream Separating (so not making this up) Shooting blanks into the air with precision performed by old people Varsity Singers (yay!) Sheep Shearing

And it repeats for two days. :) Now - I for one am excited about this element - because I WANT to see the sheep shearing. The woman who i imagine is NOT excited is the poor girl who is performing the sheep shearing who, rather than bringing one sheep - has to bring, like, forty. Or maybe she just velcros the wool back on. Or spray adhesive. Or FOAM.

So - yes - as I wrote the VARSITY SINGERS - the 'choir of show' to which our own young Lederle Jr. is a member... And this is the first time we will get to see Brent perform. Rich and I spoke to him about the big day (because I wanted a candy apple... and he works at the candy store...actually called "The Party Store"... so maybe it's the Lindsay Lohan definition of 'candy' which DOES lead to a party. So maybe Lindsay gets her stash in Huntington from Brent. Who knows. Those Lederle's are a wild bunch.

Anyway - we were talking to him and I wanted to know if all eight of the shows they were performing at the Festival (it's like working on a Vegas schedule...except with flannel and fewer nipple tassels. Except on the sheep). Now - keep in mind that Brent had last told us they were working on a catalog of music by Richard Rogers. And Brent says... the program is the same...but the solos change. And I wanted to know what the solos were... because I would rather NOT hear 'In my own little corner' if I can avoid it, y'know? And Brent says... well it's all stuff like "Jimmy Crack Corn" and "Johnny Come Marching Home". Now... it took several minutes to establish that the students at the High School did NOT think that Richard Rogers wrote "jimmy Crack Corn". It turns out they always to do the SAME songs at the Pie-oneer Phestival every year - and they work on this themed show for later on. So - the Phestival stuff is all Americana who-haa.

Rich and i are now very excited because we spent half our evening trying to come up with appropriate choral arrangements of Jimmy Crack Corn. And none of them were remotely palatable. So we can't WAIT to see what they pull out of their flannel hats. Probably with ear flaps.

The evening was rounded out by watching the HOW TO STAIN YOUR OWN SHITTY CONCRETE FLOOR AND NOT KILL YOUR BOYFRIEND WHO'S STUPID IDEA IT WAS DVD. (It was my idea). So the video - although not reallly quite worth the purchase price which was about three shit-boxes - WAS helpful. We at least have seen them do this. They keep saying "This job is best done with three people... this job is best done with three people.... and then you do this...with three people". So we're thinking that Janice is gonna be cursing me out sometime in the near future. Hey - you're life isn't complete until you've sloshed muralic acid with a mop, right?

The very good news is - that we think we CAN accomplish it... and we have actually ORDERED CHEMICALS to start the process. We've ordered primarily the stuff that will take up the old tile residue in the front part of the foyer... and getting that stuff up is gonna suck. suck. suck.

Ok - well - the next blog should be all about my lightning sheet-rock installation. Janice arrives in the afternoon for the weekend - and even though I've been a very busy bee - she's gonna chew my ass out if there is not at least some drywall hangin'.

ok kids... You go right ahead and crack corn. It's a free country. xoxo jojo.