House inspection... Detection of imperfection... and Rich's minor infection.

Rich is under the weather. When I'm sick I'm the kind of person that wants coddled... and tucked in... and coddled. Rich is the kind of person who draws a demarcation line in chalk and gets a restraining order. :) He's actually been a brave little soldier...but he's definitely coming down with something. Or maybe he's faking so he won't have to install joists. I'm actually having some tummy trouble too... and don't you DARE blame the pie. I actually am placing the blame squarely with Applebees Oriental Chicken Salad. Serves me right for ordering a salad with a politically incorrect name. It should be Salad of Asian Decent. Whatever. So this blog is gonna be short and I'll elaborate more tomorrow. Yesterday was long - so cut me some slack.

At eight thirty this morning (yes... six am yesterday... eight thirty today... what's the world coming too???) we had the house inspection with Brian, who is also our electrician. He offers both services and actually has super nifty magnetic truck signs so that when he is doing either job it looks like he has a truck that is devoted to one profession - so people don't ever think he's just moonlighting. They snap on and snap off in two minutes - and they look great. So i want to get them for Mr. Sparkle when we open. Ok - I said short blog... and I'm talking about magnets. yeesh.

The inspection did not start in a particularly promising way. They water company turned the water on to facilitate the inspection... so the water was on... and yet was not. No running water. Or, as it turned out, no running water going into TAPS. It turned out it was running to the house, but then running out of the pipes onto the basement floor because the pipes had separated somewhere down there. Rich did not look thrilled. So we needed to get Keith the plumber to come check it out and give us a ballpark... but Brian thought it might be like six thousand. Which was about eighty percent of the price of the house. Now... of course six thousand isn't a terrible figure for plumbing, and eighty nine hundred is a stupid price to be able to buy a house... so it's all relative. But it's money we weren't thrilled to hear we might have to spend - when we don't have much money in the first place. And on we went inspecting...

Surprisingly the extremely bizarre looking wiring (it's run through pvc plumbing pipes... I'm all for 'waste not want not'...but come now) was not in bad shape. The lights all turn on and Brian, being an electrician, said it might not look pretty, but there's really nothing too terrible about it. Up in the attic he said there was a lot of the original Thomas Edison approved wiring...like the way the ACTUAL Thomas Edison told people to wire a house... but he said there are hundreds of thousands of old houses that still have the exact same stuff in use. Who knew? The floors have some major slant-age... you can put a marble down on the floor and you'd be chasing it for the next six years... and the a bunch of fixtures need replaced. But structurally he said pretty much... it's an old house.... and this is what old houses do. The foundation looks good and he says it's not gonna go anywhere. So basically everything was pretty encouraging. It needs a crap load of work for it to be nice... but anyone who thinks they can buy a house for eighty nine hundred that DOESN'T need work to be pleasant is buying a Barbie Dream House. Or maybe even only Barbie's 'I'll live with it till Ken get's a rasie" House. Not that Barbie doesn't contribute to the family income too.

So the big question was gonna be the plumbing. If the whole place needed refitted then it could be a big expense. So Rich wondered if we should really go ahead with the thing or not. We both were pretty sure that it was still the right thing to do.... but we're due to give them final approval for moving ahead with closing... and you know how jitters kick in. And we don't want to be making a mistake with something into which we're going to have to invest so much of our own labor. Hmmm.... call Keith. Or rather, Desiree, she-who-Keith-must-obey, and one of our very very favorite people. For some reason she thinks we're fun... and Keith seems to have been told to treat us special-like. So she got Keith to come out THIS EVENING (amazzzzing) and meet us there.

We were on our way there when Rich got accosted by the guy that wants us to do a private showing of Rocky Horror Picture show around Halloween to tie-in with a Haunted House thing he runs. And it's something Rich and I were looking into being able to do... but we have to make sure the foyer will be ready by then... that we can get the projector working and the auditorium cleaned out (and our entire LIFE is in there right now...boxes and boxes and 2x4 and drywall and tools and tools and cabinets and vanities and lions and tigers and bears. So it would be a lot of work for us. We would like to do it simply to get 100 or so people into the building to see the foyer and get some buzz about what we're doing - but he only contacted us a few days ago and we haven't had a chance to work out the timeline. Anyway - he jumps Rich on the street as we are about to go with Keith who's dropped everything to be with us. And I just don't think you keep a plumber waiting... especially one who's doing us a favor...and who's being super nice to us. So this guy is talking and talking - all about things that would be perfectly sensible to discuss any other time - but I politely said "we have the plumber waiting to go do an assessment... I'm really sorry but I"m afraid we can't do this right now." And he still is talking about the the paper bags you have to fill with toast and rice (about two hundred petrified versions of which we threw out when we arrived here) etc etc. And Rich and I are concerned that in a very conservative community this guy does not exactly KNOW what the Rocky Horror show entails in it's content and lewd audience obligitory participation... but we're not going to get into that now. And I start bouncing around like a three year old who has to pee.

Finally we manage to wrap things up - and super nice Keith - who luckily was be-musingly watching my pee dance - said it was fine. And we head over to the house. Then it turns out Desiree wants to see the house too (cause she wants to make sure we don't screw ourselves up - cuz she rocks) and she pulls up right behind us with the baby in tow. Ok - so in general Rich and both dislike children. And babies. Babies who cry. Genetically we are both in favor of cloning so that the need for children who scream and cry will be totally unnecessary. Pop them out at eighteen...that's my vote. Our partnership is secure only in our mutual desire not to breed. But THIS BABY - and I'm am not just saying this in case she reads the blog despereately hoping to earn a discount - this baby is AMAZING. It is the cutest thing with giant eyelashes and white blonde hair and huge blue eyes. And it just sat there with a little smile on it's face while Desiree bounced her around like a bag of groceries up and down stairs in and out of this musty stinky house. Heck - it makes me wanna be a little whiny. But no... this kid was happy as a clam. Amazing. Whatever they feed this kid they should bottle it and have it in syringes on Jet Blue.

So... Keith crawled down into the gooey (and gooey is a good word...cuz it was muddy and small and dark and not too fun) basement hatch hole thing. Looked around and popped his head back up. We wandered around and he poked around and Rich and he did very serious pipe talking and things and Desiree and I talked about equally important things like pork. And pie. After a while Keith said he would get us an official breakdown of a quote by the morning. But he gave Rich a ballpark and it was MUCH MUCH MUCH MUCH MUCH BETTER than what we were worried about. Yayyyyyyy.

So then Rich and I went back to theatre in front of Natalie, and Rich went "You think we should go ahead and do it, right" and I went "YOU think we should go ahead and do it right?" and he said "Well... what do you think?" and I said "Well, what do you think"...and he said "Well I want to do what you think is best"... and I said "What the crap are you talking about... the only way I know to do ANYTHING other than pee around this place is because YOU say you think it's best. You're the pack-leader dumbass". And he said "It's going to be a lot of work" And I said "Of course it's gonig to be a lot of work... it's a crap-hole". So we did it. Hurrah.

We also bought carpet today. We went to the carpet place that's kind of on the way to Wallmart where we had found the best prices and picked out the remnants we wanted - yes, we measured beforehand. They didn't have the color I picked out originally...but it was a score cuz I actually like this color a lot more. I'll stick up pictures of it tomorrow. It won't get installed for a while cuz in my office the hot water heater has to go OUT and in his office a hot water heater has to go IN. His doesn't need padding, but mine does... so we got that too. He's happy with an industrial, but I wanted something plush (but cheap) because I like to work on the floor. Yes... I did lay down on it in the warehouse and see if it was comfy... sue me. And, I never knew how fun carpet padding was. It's so bouncy. I had no idea that's what gives carpet it's squishy funness. And it's fun lookin' too... like Jackson Pollock decided to manufacture giant rolls of poofiness.

While we were there we also pulled a couple tile samples that weren't unlike stuff we had seen at Magic Tile Land of Dreams a few days before. Every time this really nice guy would disappear to his computers to get a quote, he'd come back kind of bewildered and sheepish and say "Wow...you have really expensive taste". Great. Anyway - we actually did find some of the stuff we need small quantities of a few bucks cheaper...but no big mega bargain. We also found a vinyl we both really liked as a possibility for the kitchen (and we hadn't really seen much, and were leaning toward tiling). We point it out to him and he says "Wow... you have really expensive taste". No shit. I have expensive taste in VINYL. I didn't know that was possible. Back to tile. Oh yeah - and we bought joists too. Joist in case.

The day seemed to zip by with all these little things going on. But the windows are officially DONE. FINITO. And the look sooooo beautiful. I can't wait to look out of their clean pristine reflection... and watch those spiders DIEEEEE!!!! (insert evil laugh here). By the time all this stuff was over it was like nine forty five. So we seduced Natalie into abandoning her starving husband and son (who were text messaging her asking "what's for dinner") and went with her to Applebees. We are already home-wreckers. Ok, Brent gave his blessing... but still. He might keel over during Varsity Singer practice due to lack of protein.

I've also managed to make major headway on the theatre logo (the theatre COMPANY logo is already done) on Illustrator - which I'm learning as I go. So that's a big step in the 'Rich not wanting to strangle me' progress direction. Cuz I was suppoesd to have that puppy crossed off the list quite a while ago.

So the fearless leader is in bed trying to feel better. Sound like a smart place to be. Thank god NO ONE needs to see us in the morning. Sleeping in. Then Joists. Where have you heard THAT before??? :)

JO JO.